Sex on a Plate in Sydney

“Think of it as slow, enjoyable sex,” was my friend’s comment when I asked him how the food would be at Tetsuya’s. Chef Tetsuya Wakuda is one of Sydney’s foremost chefs and brings his own philosophy to the meals he prepares. Be prepared for a four-hour fine dining experience that ends with a satisfactory orgasmic experience — just as my friend promised.

On offer is chef’s degustation menu paired with an exquisite collection of wines and prepared with fresh ingredients.

Tetsuya’s signature dish comprises a confit of Tasmanian ocean trout on a bed of seaweed. The crisp taste of the seaweed blended well with the subtle flavours of the fennel salad and the trout. This is one of Chef Tet’s most photographed dishes. The tastes were as exotic as the names with the right blend of subtlety and texture. The beauty of the entire meal were the perfect combinations and how the actual flavors are allowed full rein without the need to add any extra condiments. In fact, chef does not use too many spices. His mastery lies in his knowledge of the ingredients and how they complement each other.

From the sea to the land the chef took us on a sensory voyage and finally it was time to cleanse the palate for dessert. A simple sorbet would not suffice, instead we were served a comte with lentils to clean our orifice and prepare it for the next gastronomic onslaught. If the meal was sexsational, the dessert was not far behind. From marinated peaches with vodka, to a banana mousse with caramel ice-cream and Tetsuya’s own chocolate cake, flavors jostled and complemented, settling on our palate with a sigh. Chef sent a blue cheese mousse with pear droppings, with his compliments. The sharp flavour of the blue cheese combined with the tiny droplets of pear added a tangy sweetness to the dessert making it just right: It was cheese and fruit with a difference.

By the time the end of the meal rolled along, we did not know what had hit us. Multiple orgasms for sure. What a meal. Each dish had its own unique flavor and seemingly unrelated tastes blended into perfect dishes. My tongue kept lapping up the sensations and my head was exploding with pleasure. Each dish was presented with a skerrick of food so the stomach was not bursting. At our request, when chef came out to meet us, all I could do was give him a big hug and say thank you.

Going into the restaurant, we had not expected anything close to such a gastronomic treat despite the fact we had been warned.

As we stumbled out, we were in a daze. There was a feeling of satiation but even more than that, our taste sensations felt like they had been attacked. Recovering from this would not only take time but it would be a long time before any meal tasted good to us. And sex too felt tame in comparison!

Photos from some of Chef Tet’s most recent creations:

Find sex on a plate at:

Tetsuya’s
529 Kent St
Sydney NSW 2000
Australia

Photo Credits: Tatsuya’s Facebook

Monika Patel suggests this read on Chef Jehangir Metha’s first NYC restaurant.