Just Get Me Out of the House (Park Slope Edition): A 5-Step Plan to Conquer Boredom Right Now
You’re bored. BOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRED. Everything is BORING!!!!! Your apartment is THE ORIGINAL BOREDOM TRAP.
Do not fear. THESE FOUR WALLS CANNOT HOLD YOU!!!!!!
What you need is the kind of hard reset that can only be solved by a good wander. Use the following plan merely as a guide; if something en route strikes your fancy, by all means, check it out!
Remember: As soon as your feet have escaped the front door, you have won.
Hot boba. Hot boba. Hot boba.
Pearl Gate serves two things: bubble tea and frozen yogurt. The fro-yo is irrelevant here (unless it isn’t, in which case go to town). They have all the flavors you think of when you think of boba — black tea, green tea, green apple, jasmine, taro, etc. — with milk, without milk, with non-dairy milk, and with various types of tapioca and jelly chewies to add in. ALSO THEY HAVE HOT BOBA, which is a revelation! The balls melt in the heat (heyooooo), rendering the tea slightly less astringent and more substantial: perfect on a cold day. You could spend hours here deciding on the perfect combination of ingredients. Take all the time you need! You are newly out of the house and that is what matters!
2. Pocket Park
Meander up the hill to 6/15 Green Community Garden, and find a shady/sunny spot to drink that boba. It’s raining? Who cares, wear something waterproof and bring a plastic bag to sit on. Watch gardeners garden their gardens. Close your eyes and listen to the sounds of nature, or possibly of parents telling their small children to “drop the shovel and don’t put that in your mouth.” Smell the smells of the plants. Just be.
3. Park Slope Food Coop
If you are a member of the PSFC, maybe this step is too strong a reminder of your real-life obligations. Feel free to skip it. Or don’t! Odds are you’ll run into someone you know who wants to invite you to a fun activity — or at least an activity that does not take place in your home — thereby extending today’s boredom repair plan. Your call. Recommended activity: constructing your optimal trail mix in the bulk bin aisle.
If you are not a member, you can’t enter the main area of the store, but you can check out the fabulously specific housing ads going up the stairs into the office. Enter the front door, walk a couple of steps in, and go through the door directly to the right of the elevator. Enjoy reading about all the other places you could live in Brooklyn…but, for various reasons, won’t.
Read up on local happenings
While you’re there, grab a copy of the Coop newsletter, the Linewaiters’ Gazette. A++ ranty letters to the editor, detailed information about PSFC bylaws, community workshop listings (“Gluten Intolerance: Fact or Fiction?”), Sudoku, the works.
Make your way back home, saying hi to every dog you meet along the way — as leisurely a hello as you/the dog/the dog’s human are comfortable with.
If you can’t with dogs, say hi to all the cats instead. Or squirrels (ugh). Pigeons? Blades of grass? Engage in cross-species communication, is the point here.
5. Achievement Unlocked
Enter apartment. Remove shoes. Put your feet up. Revel in your status as a changed, freshly UNBORED person.
Go ahead, pat yourself on the back.
My Park Slope Suggestions
Pearl Gate $
482 5th Ave
b/t 7th Ave & 12th St
6/15 Green Community Garden $
274 15th St, Brooklyn, NY 11215
Park Slope Food Coop $
782 Union St, Brooklyn, NY
Chaia has also written about how to do Ithaca with a newborn baby and where to go for a non-traditional NYC bachelorette party.